As I sit in Wild Joe's Organic Coffee & Tea House, where I have now spent many a weekend day writing, editing, and re-editing this book, I am proofing the edits my book designer implemented for me last week. Is it normal to start hating your very own book? I can't help but wonder this, as I'm hitting that stage very quickly.
More significantly, as I read and re-read each chapter; each journey through the high highs and low lows of Motherhood, I feel the emotions all over again. The silly, gleeful and heartelt moments cause me to laugh out loud such that my coffee shop neighbors turn and give me that half accomodating smile that says, "whatever you're working on must be better than what I'm working on." But the difficult stories--the ones of prenatal and postpartum depression, of isolation, of lonliness, and chasing after the impossible Perfect Mom role that I am never destined to attain...those are really hard to dredge up again and again. Now years later, the memoires evoked are still raw.
So, I guess I don't hate the book so much after all. I guess if I can still tap into my own emotions that inspired the writing of A Dozen Invisible Pieces in the first place, it is still a worth while project. It is still worth putting out there. And after today, I am another step closer.
Released April 18th, 2008
- Kimmelin
- I live with my husband and three children in Bozeman, Montana where I teach childbirth and parenting preparation classes through my own private organization, Pregnancy to Parenthood. I have an undergraduate degree in creative writing from the University of Puget Sound, a Physician Assistant certificate from Saint Francis University, as well as Red Cross First Aid/CPR and Lamaze educator certifications. I am a frequent contributor to Montana Parent magazine. Please visit my website at: http://www.adozeninvisiblepieces.com
2 comments:
I can't think of some of the emotions, the thoughts I had at times. They still hurt, especially when I stare into the chocolate eyes of my daughter.
I am attempting to brazen them out right now! It is difficult. It took over two years for someone to finally listen to me when I told them what was going on in my mind!!!! Alas, it is much better now but the lose of my marriage and my daughters delayed speech just added to the casualty list.
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